What its like....

so i wonder sometimes if the people in my life really know what its like to be me... not many people know this about me but i belonf to the autism spectrum... I am an adult with aspergers syndrome. AS is a high functioning for of autism that affects social and cognitive devolopement and some other quirky things (i suggest googling if you want more info)
But i bring it up cause lately i'm feeling invisible and misunderstood. I know that i want to be just like everyone else but the fact is i'm not and i dont know if anyone can truly understand what its like to be me... how different i feel, how isolated i feel.
this past weekend i went to a conference on Autism spectrum disorders and first responders, and i was surrounded by people just like me, or people with children just like me and it was the first time in a long time that i felt completely confident.
One of the presenters was a woman living with high functioning autism and she likened autistic people to agates... when you first see them on the beach they are this rock with a slightly different appearance but then when you take the time to see inside its something beautiful and amazing and mindblowing.
now the question is... do you know whats inside me.... even more importantly do you care?

I dont know why i'm suddenly struggling with this issue... perhaps its school and trying to figure out all the crazzy things inside my head... but stay tuned... cause i'm awfully thoughtful these days

Guess Who's back???

(back again.... shadys back so tell a friend) ummmm just kidding... no its me....

School officially started today offering me regular web access so I think its time i started writing again...

Its been one of those summers... where everything has seemed so surreal...

I almost feel like rip van winkle yet here i woke up with a clear sense of direction and what i want to be doing... In 3 semesters i will have my degree in human services. I have an internship possiblity lined up for this summer in DC. and i am taking part in a wonderful training program through the government called Partners In Policy making (they train disabled adults or parents of disabled children to advocate for themselves).

K is moving home (by home i mean back to me) in 9 days... I never did stop loving her.... i was just a fool and i think we spent too much time dreaming and not enough on the realistic aspects of a relationship... But i've learned a ton this summer and i plan on taking all those lessons and applying them to bettering myself and my life...